The Obstacle Course

There is a simple fact of life that whenever you put out for something new, be it a new thought, feeling or action, you are going to be confronted with everything in your nature that isn’t compatible with the new course. The obstacle will either be some psychological hurdle within or something external like family, friends and attachments to the old. This is why it can feel so challenging when you first implement a course change and why so many fail. If there was nothing standing in your way, you would already have that which you desire. Most people don’t understand this and at the slightest hint of adversity they roll over and say something like "Oh, it wasn’t meant to be".

This simple cause and effect equation can be seen in just about any fairytale or hero’s journey. Hansel and Gretel encounter the wicked witch. Snow White has big problems with the evil Queen. The guys in Lord of the Rings go through a rather long winded hell before they reach their destination.

A popular way to divert focus from the goal is to create a drama. For example, Jane loved horses all her life but in the city where she lived there was little opportunity to actualise her passion. At 52, she got a job at the stables of a famous race horse trainer. For safety reasons she was required to wear steel capped boots and so went to the shop to get fitted. At the shop, the store clerk then proceeded to talk her into buying boots that were too small for her feet, insisting that these should be tight fitting. After her first day on the job the blisters on her feet were so bad that she couldn’t go to work for 2 weeks. She began to have doubts that this job maybe wasn’t meant to be. Fortunately she understood what was occurring and was able to clear through the obstacle. And so, 3 months down the track and a few scars later, her heart is singing in her work.

I find it fascinating to witness the number of people who come to me for healing only to come back the following week reporting about how they have had the busiest, most stressful week ever and got so caught up in it that they didn’t have a spare second in the day to focus on the new choice. By the time I see them next, they are back to where we started. The usual response is that it would have been a lot worse if they hadn’t come and seen me.

Deep down Louise knew that it was time to change her life but instead kept entertaining a busy being busy lifestyle to avoid the change until one day she broke both legs, which put a stop to the busyness and forced her to face the inevitable. This took her on an inner journey and implemented the life change that had been calling her.

Another mistake to avoid is placing blame on others. This is very much what often happens when people embark on a more ethical way of living. If, for example, they have set themselves the goal of becoming peaceful, then every element of conflict and turbulence that is within them is liable to emerge. And often they will not see that this is indeed an element of their own natures. They will look out through that turbulence within themselves, deny ownership and claim that it’s someone else doing it to them.

Often when we ask for the new, the first thing that happens is some egoic past desire comes up. For example, when Thomas made the commitment to leave the small town he grew up in, he was offered a dream job. Everyone said, "This must be what you are meant to do". It wasn't. Whenever you say you are going to commit to something and move forward on the new, what happens is, the old goals that you have put energy into, yet may no longer be appropriate, will sometimes arise like ghosts from the past. And unless you choose the new, you will fall back into the same pattern and go around in circles, missing these wondrous opportunities you have asked for. If something feels familiar then it’s not the new. You have to feel the trepidation of stepping into the unknown or it isn't the new. The new will always have challenges to see if you have learned your lessons.

Most people are unconscious of all the forces in their nature which they have mobilised by their patterns of repeated daily habit in thought, feeling and action. When you decide to change direction, to drop old habits and take on new ones, you will automatically find yourself up against the accumulated momentum of your past that you didn’t even know was there. Once you have followed a certain course of living for a while, you build up an impetus of habit or inertia which carries you along. Something which is set in motion will continue to move in that same direction unless acted upon by an outside force, or it will continue to remain at rest unless acted upon by an outside force.

The obstacle can be quite complex because it is made up of forces working at many levels of your personality. People make good resolves to change some physical habit; but you know what difficulties can arise for the person who decides to give up drugs, alcohol, smoking or even to stop taking the occasional unnecessary cup of coffee.

You may have decided at some point to give up smoking. The resolve is made and at first all seems well. But when the time that you normally have a cigarette comes around, the
physical organism asserts the habit that has been implanted in it and demands a cigarette. Tobacco numbs the emotional body so all the emotional issues that have been suppressed by smoking arise to haunt you. At the same time a cigarette might provide a pretext for resting from some activity, perhaps abandoning some anxiety, having a break from some work that you don’t enjoy. The result of all this is that a clamour for the cigarette is set up at many levels of your being. At this point the mind is activated and offers the comment that you might as well have a cigarette, and that if you want to give it up, you can do it tomorrow instead.

It requires a certain amount of effort to get something to move when you’re pushing it along the floor, but once it is moving it requires minimum effort to continue moving it. It will tend to want to continue in that particular direction, unless you apply a certain amount of force. As soon as you let it stop again, you have to exercise the same amount of effort again to get it to move again. It’s similar with a goal which is set in motion.

That force is supplied through an effort of will and maintained through this process of maintaining attention on your intention. You need to focus and marshal as much will as the amount of inertia coming from all sources, both within and without, which is attempting to prevent the new direction or change of course.

Natalie decided that she wanted a new job that she felt passionate about, but when she put out for this, low self-worth issues arose that needed to be cleared before she was able to create enough space for the new to come in. Her ego presented her with many reasons as to why it wouldn’t be a good idea. She shelved the idea of a new job for quite some time and stayed in her comfort zone, settling for being less than all she could be. The result was that she didn’t enjoy her work and lived for the weekend and holidays. Years down the track she finally found a way to clear all the barriers and follow her heart into a new job that she loved, only to be left wondering why it had taken her so long to get there.

It is important to remember to recognise what is happening. Then you can wait patiently and watch the storm blow itself out, and it takes as long as it takes. The big mistake people make is in forgetting that they are clearing away what is blocking their desired goal and instead associate with being that which is coming up to clear. It’s a bit like not being able to clean your home because you are the dirt.

The key is to maintain attention on your intention in all moments and staying aware of what dynamics you are creating. Allow your intuition to illuminate your mind to give you the inspiration to be able to foresee consequences and to see an obstacle before it’s actually here. Then take steps to eliminate or move around that obstacle. Call in some perseverance, which is produced with tenacity and a willingness to endure and enjoy the new!

Bio: Jenny Parker has studied the healing process and accelerated human change for over 25 years. This knowing and wisdom is put to good use with people worldwide in her work as a coach and mentor, healer, writer and inspirational speaker. For more info go to www.heartforce.com.au or email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it